Ask for Directions - Saving face or time?

The GPS took me to one of many hospital buildings where I needed to go for an appointment.  Unfortunately, it could not show me the most convenient parking lot so I asked a delivery man beside the road, where was the best place to park.  He directed me to a lot behind the building. What do you do when you're on the run and need directions?

Not too surprisingly, men and women have a whole different take when it comes to asking directions according to Deborah Tannen.  Have the differences ever roused your curiosity?  Willingness to ask has a lot to do with point of view and hierarchy.

From a woman's point of view, asking directions involves a quick connection to a stranger and getting what you need without losing time, Tannen suggests.  On the other hand, from a man's perspective, he would be putting himself in a one-down position to a stranger -- an uncomfortable experience, Tannen notes.  Many men might also see this as counterproductive, since if the other person really doesn't know, he could send you on a wild goose chase in order not to appear one- down.  So for most men, it makes more sense to find the way on their own.

The right hippocampus of the human brain houses the mental maps that we use to find our way around.  Added to that the human brain is hard wired for hierarchy.  We learn these cultural approaches early on in life so we can be stuck in a rut.  Willing to take a risk change, since humans can rewire their brains by using a different approach?

Interestingly, the delivery man took a few minutes to find out more specifics from another person.  What is your experience with directions?  A year ago I tried to find the parking lot on my own, located one quite far away and was late.  This year I asked for directions to save time.  Do you ask or try to find your way on your own?

Write Inclusively to Welcome All

When I chose a quote at the beginning of my last blog, I hesitated because it used the word "man" to stand for all humans. As a woman I felt left out of the picture when it comes to brains, since that was the focus of the quote. I let it be though it's presence kept prickling like a thorn. Have you ever found yourself in this dilemma? Using inclusive language works best to welcome all folks to your blog.

Exclusive language sets up a hierarchy, that lifts a speaker or writer above others. While higher social status leads to health for some, on the other side, folks who feel stressed by exclusion frequently experience high rates of cardiovascular and depression/anxiety-like syndromes.

When you hear the word, "man," immediately a picture of a man comes to mind. And that's why I was bothered and why Jean Browman felt left out when it came to brains. While "mankind" was universally used for centuries, more recently inclusive language represents all humans.

Specifically, when Jean Browman, visited my blog for the first time, she noticed a quote which begins, "The brain is the man..."

Unfortunately, there was a lot of early research that "proved" the brains of men were superior to those of women. Now that we have MRI's and other amazing neuroresearch tools, we know more about the differences in the brains of men and women. One is not necessarily superior to the other, they simply work differently. But, even today top level people express these older stereotypes... Even Lawrence Summers, past President of Harvard University, said "women may not have the same innate abilities in math and science as men." The impact of that statement led to his resignation. The quote itself subtly perpetuated a stereotype about the brains of men compared to women.

So what does a writer do to make language more inclusive? Here're six tips...

1. Avoid sexist terms by using plural forms rather than singular. For instance, physicians check their patients. Judges check their dockets for daily activities.

2. Speak in terms of all people... Words such as human beings, humans, people, replace the words, man or men.

3. Delete any instances of a person's race, ethnicity, age group, or handicap from your writing when it has no bearing on the topic at hand. Good editing prevents promoting a stereotype based on a variety of human characteristics.

4. Describe groups of people consistently... Don't single out women to describe physical beauty, clothes or accessories or note a disabled person's use of an aid, or refer to the race of the only minority in a group unless it is at that individual's request.

5. Steer clear of jargon related to a field... Technicians and academics need to change field related terms or define them in everyday language when sharing information with a general audience.

6. When using a quote from a past era, use inclusive language in brackets to replace any sexist forms." "The brain is the [person]."

I've learned much from my error. Let's welcome more readers by making sure language is inclusive.

Thanks, Jean. I'm including the brain picture you drew and posted on Flickr after reading the blog. I'm glad inspiration led you to draw it!

Thoughts?